A Deadly Chocobo -A.K.A.- Evl_Brd's Revenge
by AlphaNinn
Summary: The third in my little chocobo non-series. Again, there is no romance, and this one doesn't even have Aeris in it!


A Deadly Chocobo   
a.k.a. Evl_Brd's Revenge   
By: Ninn   
_______________________________________________________________________ 

The third story in my little chocobo non-series. No Aeris in this one, so don't worry! This one   
has Yuffie.   
But I don't think I can beat the first one. I liked that one - and judging from the reviews, so did   
you. And I'm not sure if this belongs in humor - but the other two were, so this one is also.   
_______________________________________________________________________   


There was a field. It was a small, grassy, open field in the middle of a warm climated area. At   
first glance nothing would seem unusual about this field, but if one waited long enough they might   
just catch a glimpse of something. No one knew what it was. 

". . . . . ." 

"Shh! You'll scare whatever it is away," Yuffie hissed. Of course, being the adventure loving   
type that she was, this was something she couldn't pass up. And she had dragged Vincent along   
with her. 

". . . . . ." 

"That's better," she paused, "So what do you think is out here?" 

He shrugged. 

"I hope it's something scary. Then we can fight it!" she realised she had spoken a bit too   
loudly, "oops." 

"Fighting isn't the remedy for everything." 

Yuffie stared at the man kneeling next to her. He had SPOKEN. "But, it's fun," she whined. 

". . . . . ." 

"You need to get out more. Learn how to talk to people!" 

"I don't like you, Yuffie." 

"Huh? Why not? Geez, if you're going to insult me, the maybe you should just shut up." 

". . . . . . ." 

"C'mon, tell me why you don't like me! Gawd, you're diffucult!" 

". . . . . you're a pain. You never shut up. You're always trying to steal our materia . . . . ." 

Materia, the word rung in her mind, "Do you have any with you?" 

"NO!" 

"Hmph," she sat and crossed her arms, then stood up suddenly when she heard some   
branches snap in the field that she was supposed to be watching. 

She screamed and jumped into Vincent's arms. He shoved her away and walked into the field. 

Yuffie jumped behind a bush, "Wha--what is it?" 

". . . . . . ." 

She ducked quickly when a large blur appeared in front of her and flew over her. Scared out of   
her mind, she began to cry. 

". . . . .crybaby. Do you even know what is supposed to be here?" 

She sniffed and wiped her nose on her arm, "I heard it was something really cool. I wanted to   
catch it and sell it. I could've bought materia with the money!" 

". . . . . . . ." 

"Aren't you going to tell me what's here?" 

"Why should I?" 

"If you're not going to be any help, then why'd you come?" 

"I thougt you knew what was here and were asking me for help." 

"Help?" she muttered meekly, "Is it something that dangerous?" 

A thought popped into his mind, "Yuffie. What materia do you have on you?" 

"What? Why do you want to know?" 

"Just tell me!" 

"Ok, ok," she paused, "Lessee, restore, revive, choco-mog, KoR," 

"Where'd you get the KoR?" 

"Well....." 

"I thought so. Give it to me." 

She complied, "I also have a full enemy skill, and a chocobo lure. Everything is mastered." 

". . . . . . ." 

"You seem worried." 

"You said you had a mastered chocobo lure." 

"Yes....... So?" 

"We're dead," he stated simply. 

"Ha ha. Very funny," she whipped the chocobo lure out of her weapon and began chanting the   
activation for it. 

Vincent paled and grabbed it from her, "Not around here!" 

"Too late," Yuffie laughed, "Soon there will be chocobos here!" 

"Damn you!" 

Yuffie was about to speak when suddenly she could see a shadow in front of her. Trying to not   
to scream, she turned to Vincent, "Ok, I'm listening. What is here?" 

"Chocobos." 

"I gathered that, but last time I chekcked, they weren't dangerous!" She hissed at him. 

"These are. These are the ones that were abandoned, the ones that were left somewhere on   
the World Map to rot, or the ones who couldn't win a race. They've gathered here to get   
revenge on people." 

"Oh Gawd! I don't wanna die!," she paused, "Did you say ones that were left on the   
World Map to rot?" 

He nodded. 

"Evl_Brd......" 

"What about Evl_Brd?" 

"Cloud left him on the World Map. Then when he went back to get the bird, it was gone." 

"If Evl_Brd is here, then we're in trouble. That thing always hated me, and it was powerful." 

Suddenly, they both became silent. 

In front of them, the chocobos were still hissing and warking at them, but they were splitting   
down the middle, clearing a path. 

"Do you think they're letting us leave?" Yuffie whispered. 

". . . . . ." 

Yuffie had taken a step forward when a single chocobo began walking down the middle. It's   
feathers gleamed gold, and it held itself high. 

'I've seen that bird before,' thougt both Yuffie and Vincent. 

"WARK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" 

"Run!" 

Yuffie didn't need to be told twice. She began running as fast as possible, then realised that   
she wasn't going anywhere. Looking behind her, she reconized the bird. 

"Evl_Brd..... you're not dead......" 

"Yuffie! Get over here!" 

"I can't! The chocobo's got me!" 

He ran back over to Yuffie, and raised his gun at the bird, "Goodbye, chocobo." 

"No, don't! This is Evl_Brd." 

"You're kidding?" 

"No," she twisted to more-or-less face the bird, "Evl_Brd. Remember me?" 

"WARK!!!!!" 

"It's me, Yuffie. I used to give you nuts when no one was looking." 

"WARK!!!!!!!!!!!" The bird pecked at her. 

"I would be the one who would stay with you sometimes on the Highwind." 

"WARK!!!!!!!!!!!" 

"Don't you remember Cloud and all the races you two won together?" 

"WARK WARK WARK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" 

"Ok, Ok, sorry." 

"kweh!" 

She turned to Vincent, "Did the bird make that sound?" 

"........I think so." 

"Ok," she turned back to the bird, "Can you at least let go of my shorts?" 

"WARK!!!!!!!!!!!!" it didn't let go. 

"Stupid bird............" Vincent muttered under his breath. 

Evl_Brd looked up suddenly, staring at Vincent, "WARK?!!!!!!!!!!!!" 

"Um.....," he looked at Yuffie, who was now dangling from the bird's beak. 

"Don't look at me - I always liked the bird. OW!" The bird had let go and she landed   
hard, "Thanks - I think....." 

"Wark." 

"See, Evl_Brd's not bad," she stroked the feathers on his back, "It's just misunderstood." 

". . . . . . . ." he stepped over to the bird and reached out a hand, which he drew back   
promptly as the bird began to peck and bite at it. 

Yuffie was petting the chocobo's neck when she hit something hard, "Huh?" she poked at it,   
and materia orbs fell to her feet, "What the?" 

Checking her weapon, she saw that the slots were empty. 

"Damn bird!" 

Vincent was laughing, "Serves you right." 

"SHUT UP!" she swung at him, but missed and ended up on the ground. Which suited her   
just fine, because she could re-claim her materia. She was replacing it in her weapon when   
she spotted the bird looming over her. Swinging her weapon it connected and sent the bird   
flying. 

Standing up, she saw Vincent aim his gun and fire, but either it missed or the chocobo didn't   
know it was hit, because it was running straight at them. 

She stared dumbly at it and at the last possible second, ducked out of the way. 

Vincent shot at it again, and hit in in the rear quarters. It warked loudly then turned and ran   
at them once more. 

She looked at Vincent, then got an idea, "Hey! Summon something!" 

He nodded and began to look through his materia. A few magics and 7 Underwater. 

"YUFFIE!" 

She started - she had forgotten about the Underwater that she had replaced what she stole   
with. Sheepishly she began to fish around in her pockets and threw a few red orbs at him. 

"I want the rest back as soon as we get back!" he shouted, then looked through the pieces   
she had thrown at him - somehow she had gotten the KoR back, because it was in that pile.   
Picking the Bahamut summon, he concentrated on the orb and called the dragon. It came   
immediatly, and picked up the chocobo it it's claws, then flew away with it. 

Yufie and Vincent stared at it, them became aware of the other chocobos closing in on   
them. Unlike Evl_Brd, these chcocbos hadn't been trained well, some of them not at all.   
It didn't take much effort to dispose of them. 

For the next many minutes, gunfire and metal clangs reverberated through the air, disturbed   
only by the "Warks" and "Kwehs" of falling chocobos. 

When the last chocobo fell Yuffie let out a loud cheer. Vincent stood there. 

". . . . . . ." 

"Something wrong?" 

"We came on a chocobo," Vincent nudged the corpse of their mount with his toe, "And from   
the looks of it, you were the one who killed her." 

"Oops. I guess we have to walk. How far is it to the nearest town?" 

"We're on an island. Remember?" 

Yuffie turned red, "Well, you have underwaters, we can swim." 

". . . . . . . .," he walked to the edge of the island and waded into the water, then bagan to swim. 

"Hey! What about me?" 

He continued to swim, ignoring Yuffie. 

"Argh! If I drown, it's your fault!" 

". . . . . . . ." 

She dove into the water and began to swim. 

**THAT NIGHT**

"Ugh, if I have to face anymore water, I'm going to turn into a fish!" Yuffie cried, as   
they were walking back to Nibelheim. Just as she finished her sentence, it began to pour. 

"Look at it this way - now they won't wonder why our clothes are wet." 

"But they will wonder where we were all day! He he he, I wonder what they're thinking.   
Both of us gone, without telling anyone where we went!" 

". . . . . . . ." 

"C'mon, lighten up a bit. I'm just kidding. Here - you can even have the rest of your   
materia back," she held her hand out, but pulled it back as he reached out to take them,   
"Nope! Not yet!" 

". . . . . . . . ." 

"Don't you want to know when? Or are you going into no talking mode again?" 

". . . . .Shut up." 

She was going to retort with something, but they were in the town now, and she realised   
how tired she was, "Well, why don't we get something to eat or something at the bar?" 

He nodded slightly, and they walked across town and into the building. 

As luck would have it, Cloud, Tifa, and Reeve were sitting in there. Yuffie groaned. 

The people at the table heard the door slam and looked over to them. 

"Hey guys," Reeve slurred, more than half drunk, "where'd'ya been all day?" 

"Yes," Tifa added, eyeing both of them, "what have you two been doing?" 

"You'll never guess what we saw today!" 

"What?" Cloud asked. 

"It was -" 

The look Vincent gave her cut her off. Maybe telling them about Evl_Brd wasn't such a   
good idea..... Oh well, since when did she keep a seceret? 

"Actually, two things happened. Remember Evl_Brd?" 

The people at the table nodded. 

"He appeared today! But..... well...... you wouldn't believe me if I told you, so Vincent,   
you tell them!" 

He mumbled something. 

"Louder" 

". . . . . . . ." 

"I couldv'e sworn I heard him say that Bahamut carried him off," Reeve hiccuped. 

". . . . . . . ." 

At that, everyone laughed. 

"And guess what?" Yuffie called, "Vincent TALKED alot today!" 

"You're kidding?" Tifa asked. 

Yuffie shook her head. 

Everyone looked at Vincent, who walked out. 

Shrugging, Yuffie sat at the table with the other three, and began to plot how she could   
get their materia.   


THE END!!!!!!!!!!!   
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Well, this is the product of more caffiene than blood in my system, and not nearly enough sleep. Heh.   
I hope you liked it.   
There's not going to be many, if any, of my chocobo stories for awhile, I have a long serious story in   
the beginning stages that I'm going to be devoting my time.   
Anywho, you know the drill. Type your review in the box, and hit submit. (Yes, I read the reviews,   
and I really appreciate them)   
  
  



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